Recently, the Chief was very distressed after receiving a package from one of our customers.
As you know, the Ministry of Stories and Hoxton Street Monster Supplies are happy to lend books to monsters and junior minister alike. However, this particular book came back a little bit worse for wear.
The picture above depicts the very last copy of the Awfully Bad Guide to Monster Housekeeping that is left in existence. This was a very old and important book in the monster community and now it’s lost to the world forever. The customer (who shall remain nameless for their own safety – it was by no means Bob) left it out only to be found by their pet dragon and alas, the book is no more.
We at the ministry feel a great sense of responsibility and obligation to replace this book. So with that in mind, we have recruited 150 local school children and five very talented poets to help us rewrite the book.
When whispers of the incident had crept out, five people came forward to help us: Caroline Bird, Charlie Dark, Laura Dockrill, Ross Sutherland and Naomi Woddis. Each poet has taken it upon themselves to head up the ranks of the Ministry and guide children from: St John the Baptist Primary School, Burbage Primary School and St Monica’s RC Primary to create a new, up-to-date version of the book.
Work has already started and we’re coming out with some corkers. These examples by St John the Baptist Primary School show the high quality of work already produced: “I am the monkey maniac, moody, magic, majestic, ministry minion.”, “I am the fire liar. I am the water storm. I am furry jam. If there’s a show and the star has had an accident, I will take over and dance till I drop and till the applause comes.”
We are really looking forward to the completion of the book and believe that it will be even better than the original.